Dear Daddy…

Dear Daddy,

I’ve let fear hush me before. I’ve accepted fear before because it was comforting. But, you’ve never let me stay there too long. You made me feel uncomfortable in my comfort. Thank you so much. Thank you for teaching me how to be brave before I knew how to be brave. Thank you for emphasizing the importance of reaching past those inner struggles and breaking free from the walls of my mind for something greater than myself. No matter what the goal was, if it was there, I may as well try.

I never fail because every opportunity is a lesson to grow from. I will have moments when I will fumble, but you have taught me to feel what I feel in that moment, without denial, and then move forward. There is no growing in staying in one place. Thank you for leading by example. I’ve taken one small step on what will , hopefully, be a long journey of fear-conquering.

Love always,


Indonesian Squat Toilet Tips


1. When in doubt splash water everywhere

2. Soap is your best friend

3. Water is your frenemy

4. Take off your pants if you’re a beginner. You are not a pro

5. Dry yourself completely!

6. Splash more water

7. Splash even more water

8. Pour water down that hole to your heart’s content….and then some. Clean everything.

9. Think of going to the toilet as a long adventure that involves removing your clothes


11. At minimum, “mandi” (bathe) at least twice a day. It will definitely be cold.

12. Use the squat toilet, then bathe right after. EFFICIENCY FTW. 

13. Google heavily if you have to


SN: Squat toilets actually aren’t that bad. Half the time I prefer them to western toilets.


So much has happened since I’ve posted LAST WEEK. I don’t even know where to begin. I’m on my phone and I have fat thumbs so I’m just going to give a brief update and expand later. Here are the basics:

1. I’ve taken a 21 hour flight from Dc to Indonesia. Well, not directly. A lot of hopping around, stiff backs, soft apologies,and then eventually not caring because sitting for HOURS has broken all of my manners (I lied I mean, come on, I’m me. I have this fear of inconveniencing people so I always try to accommodate others needs above my own. I’m definitely a people pleaser. I should most definitely take care of that….but wouldn’t that be an inconvenience for my therapist? The cycle never ends!)
2.I’ve been in Indonesia since Monday! It’s amazing, it’s beautiful, and it’s humid as hell. Of course there are setbacks but what doesn’t have it’s setbacks? I seriously can’t complain. Everyone has been so kind, courteous, open, and thoughtful. Here people GREET one another!!it is so refreshing to say “Selemat Pagi” (good morning) and have a genuine reply.
3. I’ve been in a continuous daze. I feel as if I’ve been shoved in front of a tv with my lids forced open being fed an overwhelming amount of information at one time. From the language learning, to meeting staff, learning about health, and learning about safety. It has been a lot to take in, but I’m confident that I’m retaining at least half of it.
4. My fellow volunteers are well educated, well-traveled people. I feel like I have so much to learn from them alone. It is hard to meet other people who share your passions, similar dreams, and similar intentions in our goals. It can be intimidating sometimes, because of how much I admire each and everyone of them. Sometimes I’ll talk to a fellow volunteer and they’ll speak of things they’ve already done and seen and I have so much respect for them

5.I’ll be meeting my host family at the end of the week!

Till next time,